Meta went straight into damage control. But it seemed no one was particularly surprised by the news \u2013 not even teenage girls<\/a>, who Meta identified as most at risk. Was the leak just confirming what we already suspected: that social media has the potential to be much more harmful than helpful?<\/p>\n How did our once carefree relationship with social media turn sour? And perhaps most importantly, can (or should) it be salvaged?<\/p>\n Relationship counselors will often ask troubled couples to think about what made them happy in their relationship. Social media, for all its annoying peccadilloes, does have some redeeming features.<\/p>\n Throughout the pandemic, the ability to stay connected to people we can\u2019t see in person has become incredibly valuable. Social media can also help people find their tribe, particularly if the people in their offline world don\u2019t share their values and beliefs.<\/p>\n But if you can\u2019t go a day without trawling through the sites, feeling compelled to \u201clike\u201d or be \u201cliked\u201d, your relationship is in trouble.<\/p>\n Though far from settled, the bulk of screen time research focuses on the detrimental effects of excessive or problematic screen use on well-being and mental health. A 2021 meta-analysis<\/a> of 55 studies, with a combined sample size of 80,533 people, found a positive (albeit small) association between depressive symptoms and social media use.<\/p>\n An important finding was that negative consequences were more likely to come from how social media use made participants feel<\/em>, rather than how long they used it.<\/p>\n In trying to understand why social media can leave us feeling less than content, we can\u2019t look past the effect of the 24\/7 news (and fake news) stream on our collective psyche.<\/p>\n A 2021 Deloitte survey<\/a> of Australians found 79% thought fake news was a problem, and only 18% felt information obtained via social media was trustworthy. Having to navigate content that deliberately aims to perpetuate fear and dissent only adds to people\u2019s cognitive and emotional burden.<\/p>\n But here\u2019s the rub. It seems while we\u2019re generally concerned about technology having a negative impact on our well-being, this doesn\u2019t translate to behavior change on an individual level.<\/p>\n My own research<\/a> published last year found more than two-thirds of survey participants believed excessive smartphone use can negatively impact well-being, yet individual usage was still very high, averaging 184 minutes per day. There was no relationship between the belief and the behavior.<\/p>\n What leads to this apparent cognitive-behavioral dissonance? The results of a long-term study<\/a> by University of Amsterdam researchers might provide a clue. They found living in a \u201cpermanently online\u201d world leads to decreased self-control over social media use and, subsequently, lower well-being.<\/p>\n In other words, we know what we\u2019re doing might be bad for us, but we do it anyway.<\/p>\n How do you know when it\u2019s time to reevaluate your relationship with social media? There\u2019s one deceptively simple question to ask yourself: how does it make you feel?<\/p>\n Think about how you feel before, during, and after you use social media. If you feel like you\u2019re wasting large chunks of your day, your week (or, dare I say, your life) on social media \u2013 that\u2019s a clue. If you feel negative emotions such as sadness, anxiety, guilt, or fear, you have your answer.<\/p>\n But if divorcing social media abruptly feels like a step too far, what else can you do to slowly break away, or potentially salvage the relationship?<\/p>\n 1. Start with a trial separation<\/strong><\/p>\n A \u201csoft delete\u201d lets you see how you\u2019ll feel without your social media before committing to a hard delete. Let friends and family know you\u2019re taking a break, remove the apps from your devices, and set yourself a goal of maybe one or two weeks where you don\u2019t access the account\/s. If the world is still turning at the end of this trial, keep going! Once you no longer feel the pull of social media, you\u2019ll be ready to hit delete.<\/p>\n 2. Reduce the number of platforms you engage with<\/strong><\/p>\n If you have Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, TikTok, YouTube, Snapchat, WhatsApp, Tumblr, Pinterest, and Reddit on your phone, tablet, and computer, you\u2019re probably past saturation point and into drowning territory. Pick one or two apps that genuinely serve a meaningful purpose for you, and ditch the rest. Gen X\u2019ers find it hard to say goodbye to Facebook, but Gen Z has largely bid it farewell<\/a>. If they can do it, so can you!<\/p>\n 3. If steps 1 and 2 are still too much, try to reduce your time spent on social media<\/strong><\/p>\n First and foremost, turn off all your notifications (yes, all of them). If you\u2019re conditioned to respond to every \u201cbing\u201d, you\u2019ll find it almost impossible to stop. Set aside sometime each day and do all your social media catching up or browsing. Set an alarm for your predetermined time allocation, and when it sounds, put the phone down until the same time tomorrow.<\/p>\n None of this will be easy, and walking away from social media might hurt at first. But if the relationship has become uncomfortable, or even abusive, it\u2019s time to take a stand. And who knows what untold happiness<\/a> you might find, beyond the four walls of your screen?Spotting the red flags<\/h2>\n
Information overload<\/h2>\n
Simple steps you can take<\/h2>\n
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